Dils Stop .

Well hello. This had been a tiring week. I been meaning to blog since ... Wednesday. But exhaustion and doing other stuffs and of course the idiotic Internet connection called Streamyx is acting up thus preventing me from opening up this. And Beta Blogger does get on my nerves. The new job is going on OK at the moment, thank you all for asking. I am still in the training phase and don't know much what to expect. Therefore I can't really answer if everything would be fine and dandy. But the new girls and guys that are going to be my colleagues seems to be great. At least there is no guy that is looking over my shoulder ALL the time. I was driving to work the first day. Gah. Me, driving to Damansara. Me who only driving range familiarity are limited from Ukay Perdana to KLCC. After the first day, I resolved to take the public transport. The parking price around there is bleeding me dry. Yes. As so continue my adventures in the public transport PUTRA LRT, where people are expected...

Busy lor. Tapi tak berani la kan nak letak busy lebey2 kat sini. Kang kena ungkit plak... (eh.. tapi diri ini tengah mengungkit jua... takdulikblogakukan and akutulisapeapeakumaw dan bagaimanacarapon) Ehem.. I am super busy today.. cause so many things to do, feeling so drowsy and have only less than 12 hour to pack my things, learn the violin, and do whatever stuffs I was suppose to do but apparently forgot. Instead I blog. Yes, thats absolutely the thing I do. Submit cheque, but HR is closed to regular employee and receptionist not there. Grrrr. Need to train the new guy before I go back. Delete all incriminating evidence of not working while working in my work computers. Hahaha. Eik.. let me dash upstairs to see if HR or any working personas are up there. Nope . Not there. Blergh. Got an email that need to send it to another person. Sigh. Email is the best communication. Imagine the time when there is no email when you are working. The horrors~ Well, I'll be going to Ipoh tonigh...

I got the chance to watch the above. Lawa tak the poster? You got to love the poster. Loveliness just ooozes out of the picture. Got interested seeing this movie cause of those beautiful red kebaya. Man. Those are lovely. Wish I could wear those. Or have those. Or have that kinda body. Ehem.. and of course period movie always got me interested. You know.. deep stuff like that. Hah, kidding. But between love stories movies set now or love stories set in the 1800s. I say give me the then. Whats the story all about? Its about Latiff latest photography project. Latiff is a renowned photographer and his current project is on pictures of abandoned houses or buildings. During that journey, he uncovers memories from his long forgotten past. A love story of a Malay woman and a colonial English guy. Various itty little bit of thoughts on it After film end, I goes like.. hurmph. Okay. It was quite a beautiful little film. It's not a magnificent film. But it is a quaint lovely little film. F...

Sorry guys. I am too busy at the moment. Or just have no mood. Pick your pick. Will update laers`. On a side note, don't it pisses you off if you don't know what the hell going on and people are blaming you for not picking up the pieces. If you want me to do something, be clear about it. I am not a pyschic to second guess what you need to do next. Ah well.. happy weekend-ing. Mine is gonna be busy.

How many post had I ever started with bored or boring. Countless. Dila... how unoriginal can you be. Yada. Yada. I am never that creative. So don't really care right. Right. Totally bored kelmarin while sitting eating alone, I was people watching the entire scene with interest. Not that there is any anything interesting happening. Nope. No couple fighting. No cute kids frolicking around. No cute girls guys to watch. Just a bunch of bored people trying to let off steam after work. Then I remembered a picture moment collection by some photographer posted on MSN website. . The photographs shown a number of couple...supposedly bored. What the photographer caption is something like... "how the spark had gone out from their eyes... " something like that. Mostly they show the middle age and elderly couple. Obviously sitting and not acknowledging one another. One of them shows couple who are too distracted with their children to notice their own spouse. As such as the picture de...

Yes.. I am turning 24 today. Or had been as in 3.19 am today . Gah. Its such a big number. I want to be 21... again. And again. I am trying to be positive today. Trying is the operative word here. Someone remarked that I gotten a tad bit gloomy lately. (Okay.. okay.. more like very gloomy and Okay... Okay... more than one person remarked I am a gloomy person). So as a birthday treat.. I will try to be cheerful today. Yes. Even if it means waking up at 3 am in the morning to prepare to go to work at 4 am. Even when speeding up the highway was startled by a horrible accident scene where you can see the driver is pinned down by his car and almost rammed into the scene of the car crash itself. . So do not want to think of accident. Birthday , remember. My birthday this year should be filled with happy thoughts. Granted not many remember my birthday ( I am not saying this to remind those who don't remember).. just that.. I don't really blame them for not remembering. I am myself are...

I went back to my hometown last weekend for one of my good friend wedding. Since the wedding reception is on Sunday and I need to work on Monday, I only spent a considerable amount of time on Saturday during the majlis akad nikah. Glad that I went to the majlis akad nikah tho. It was more calmer and not many people popping in and out of the bride room. So we got some time to catch up with each other news. Looking around at my old gang of the school, I smiled inwardly. I can just remember each and every one of them with the old school uniform. In class. Talking. Doing homework. Now one of us are getting married. Its so surreal. One of my friends even bring up the silly things we did at high school. On how we were fighting who will get married first. Yes.. now we know it would not be determined by your birth month. And the list of boyfriends (and those are such keepers...) and crushes that we had. Haha. And the things I did and say to the teacher that was pissing me off. We were such a j...

Yes, yes I will update. I know I got increasingly lazy. But its due to my schedule really. Still not very happy, taqi :P I woke up at 4 am now to get to work to 5am. So all days things just seems very blurry and very yawny. I am so not a morning person. But its kinda nice to get back at home early and I got to watch some Buffy action alone. (I am a HUGE Buffy fan, so don't keep on asking if I am still watching it..Because, yes I am still..) Anyway few days back.. or last week, I suddenly had a dream about one guy. No one special. He used to my classmate when I was in school at Johor. We had been classmates for several years, but both of us rarely talk. He was the strong silent type. So its also one of the reason I rarely talk to him. Not to mention he was sitting at the opposite end of the class. I got a little crush on him I think at the time. Not the real school girl crush where at few months or weeks time, you kinda pine on him or get excited and jump up and down telling your fr...

That's the basic questions you got the first week you got back from Raya hols. My Hari Raya was fine but boring. Things are quiet since all my sisters are now married and my youngest bro think it would be fine to raya-ing alone at Sabah (he was mistaken since he kept on whining to call us there is no food. Hah.. Padan Muka. Nak sangat rase Raya sensorang) . So it was only my Mother, me and my other brother. My brother also agreed to work for 1st to 3rd Raya. Things are even more quiet. First Raya was spent with looking after my grandmother. She is wheelchair bound and there is nobody at the house she is staying. I spent the day lolling in idleness, eating kueh raya while reading a story book. Yeah.. how's that for a jolly raya. Raya 2nd and onwards was more... bising with the arrival of the usual sdara mara and my sisters and their hubbies. Food this year is not as abundant as last year. But I manage to put on weight even though that usually don't happen before these for Ha...

I am pissed today. I am not feeling well. I am just feeling pissed for no reason. So whatever. And... Jeeezzz. I don't feel like blogging. I felt like .... I don't know what to feel anymore. It is no use. Yups yups. Whatever the use of it.. what's the use of feeling. Hahaha.. How morbid. I will laugh tomorrow. No doubt. But my laugh ... it wouldn't be the same right? Its not the same as my laugh... 2 or 3 years ago? And it is not the same laugh as you would laugh? Whatev. I would laugh. Everyone change. But instead of metamorphising to big beautiful multi colored dainty butterfly. I think of myself... of more of a big fat caterpillar munching on tasteless leaves looking at other butterflies going from flower to flower. Not changing. Not flying. I see everyone is happy and content. Hurmph. I wish.. I could have that sense of contentment.. or happiness. Just a lil bit. But I do, of course... all I need to do is just watch TV. Sometimes I wonder.. at the obvious lovey do...

Fine.

Hello. The haze is decidedly better than yesterday. And the road are less congested today since Selangor cuti. So it had been a pretty nice morning. I was anticipating a few new series and of course some ol series back for the fall. I had started before on Greys Anatomy and Shark. God, I sound dull. Anyway.... Runaway This show is not very popular I think. But I quite like it. It is about a family on a run because their father is framed for murder and wanted by the police. The father wanting to prove his innocence, changed the whole family identity asking his children to chant their new identities while they make a run across the States to hide and also start a new but fake life. Doing this, he hoping that he could prove his innocence in time before they are found out. It is basically a family drama and have it little plot and twist. Also with the kids starting in school it gave the drama its light hearted moment. Kinda like Everwood meet Prison Break: Manhunt. Heroes Most of the guys ...

You know what pisses me off. " Why does brand X product is much more cheaper than your product?" How would I know. I am not the people "up there" who tentukan the price. If I do, I will not be sitting here answering your question. " Between brand X and brand Y, which is better and what should I purchase?" Why oh why are you asking me in the first place? I am working for brand Y company. OF COURSE I will say you need to purchase our product and our product can bring you thousand of pleasure. " I lost my CD, how can I reinstall my product?" Well.... the answer is in the question I am about to ask you.. if you bought a vacuum cleaner. And you lost it. Do you come back to the manufacturer demanded they do something about it? " Your company had acted dishonestly. I was promised a discount!! I had purchased the product and manipulated into believing it will cost cheaper.. I want my discount now!!" Buying discounted product anywhere less...

I am now typing this without my spectacles. Well.. nooo.I haven't start wearing contact lense again. I lost my spectacles when I was sleeping. I fell asleep yesterday. SHeer exhaustion from overeating. Hahaha. Ehem. Anyway. So if I fell asleep without any of the necessary preparation of going to sleep... you know, eye cream, brush hair, glass of milo and a book on my lap. That means.. I fell asleep while still wearing the spectacles. I woke up. It isn't there. I think my sis or mom maybe had taken em off. Ad put them somewhere where I can't see or find. It make me think that this is the time I long for a contact lense. Iused to wear one. No fear. I am not such a geek. It was during my industrial internship. So I can afford to get one. But when I got back to UTP again, it get kinda tiring (having to continuously take it off and on since my sleep hour was erratic) and expensive. Now, with a steady job (I hope), the thought had flit my mind once in a while. But I also have a c...

On Friday I greatly anticipate the new season of Greys Anatomy. Not dissapointed. Shonda Rimes is a great writer. And she put what we feel into words and expression exactly. Meredith can be quite tiring, especially whenever she got close with McDreamy. But got to love the interaction she have with the other cast, Izzie, George, Cristina. And I love the last scene. When Izzie is being helped out of her prom dress by Meredith. (I thought the writers is about to let her wear that prom dress for several days). It translate to some what I sometimes felt. I have a thing on letting go or reminiscing. Yeah.. well (you know me). Especially......OK. Say that.. if I had been to a really great date. When I got back home, I hate to get myself out of that clothes. Even if my clothes reek of cigarette smoke, I would love that smell. It gave me the heady sense of still being in that date. After the clothes was wash and I would fold it or hang it, I would smell the fresh laundry smell, a smile would ho...

Well well. I wanna join in the bandwagon and blog Ramadhan too. Yeay. Well.. everybody know what is drawing near. You know what time it is... Yes! Food galore. Food that usually only come up once a year appear. Yes! The time of year that all people think we can diet or lose weight in the fasting month... but how completely wrong we are since our berbuka puasa food is just too full of goodiess goodness thingies. The time of month where traffic jam is at the most worst after work hour. Yes , yes , I am not completely sidetracked here. It is the time where all us sinners should take the opportunity to grovel and beg for Allah forgiveness for us wrongdoing and transgressions. It is the time where we need to shed our bad habit.. and try to keep it that way too. It is the time to multiply our good deeds and ibadah to Him. Therefore being a person who is so flawed that she herself are sometimes ashamed of self, I want to seek forgiveness to those around me. First of all to my family who have ...

I was thinking.... that I don't really live my life quite healthily. I love good food. What I meant by good is.. those oily, extra fat, red meat, rich in cream and goodness food. So okay.. I need to exercise.... a bit. Last weekend.... 8.30 a.m : Gaaahh.. alarm clock. Head feel heavy. Cold. Rain had just stop. Want to sleep..and be fat until will grow disgusting to all creatures and men. 8.38 a.m : Peel self from blankie and other blankie. Rinse head in water for cold water shock treatment and brush teeth. 8.45 a.m : Went to room at top a.k.a storage room in search of decent shoes. Obviously cannot gad about exercising in sandals or high heels. Very unseemly. 8.55 a.m : Baaaahhh.. could not find shoes.. rummaging through piles brought from UTP that had not been opened 2 years ago. Could not find shoes. Found high heels. Found sandals. Ooohhhh.. I forgot I still have these sandals. But no shoes resembling shoes that are fit for cycling or running. 8.57 a.m : Found a neat red sneaker...

Today I read about the killing spree at a college in Montreal . It bring back to mind again the events of another killing spree in a school in America almost 6 years back. And another one. And another. The killer in Montreal cite his reason as problems with the women. Hence killing all he could find. The killer at the Columbine High School were believed was being bullied to no end and could not stand the peer pressure. Ted Bundy. The charming serial killer who chose his victim since they looks like his ex girlfriend who dumped him. So? Why did 'cha do it? What reason indeed you can lamely tell somebody on why you choose to take the life of an innocent person. Is it the one act of traumatic terror and events that can change you to take a gun and wildly shoots anyone around you? Or a quiet, persistent push and shove and constant pain, with silent sneer looking at you whenever you try to fought back that you just gave up and decide to let somebody else just feel that pain? Some might...

Some people knew I was in love. Some people guessed who is the lucky or unlucky guy. I knew of 2 of you out there who is still keeping the list on the possible guys on who I had set my eyes upon and are still guessing who is this guy are. I hate talking about this now. As you might had noticed, I had grown cynical and somehow disillusioned about love. And I don't believe in love anymore. At least from my part, my life. I believe it happens to everyone else. I believe people could love me. I believe people could love each other. I don't believe the person that I love would love me back. I find it increasingly hard to believe I could love again. Maybe a different kind of love. Not that kind of love again. It is sad. I first open this particular post wanting to say I wanted to move on. Just when I am about to type on how I wanted to move on, I got to know.. well something.... And I know I that I was wrong. I had not move on. I particularly hate myself now. I don't hate him, no...

Today is such a sleepy day. I finished reading the Bridget Jones articles. Ended with her birthing a beautific baby boy while I am screaming (in my head of course), "I want more, I want more." Its rather puzzling. I was reading all the columns from 1995 to 1997 .It ended abruptly in 1997 when Bridget was caught snoggin a 14 year old boy. Shocking, but quite accidental. Then it started suddenly in 2006 again with Bridget having a prenatal scan with Daniel. She obviously are pregnant with Daniel child. WHeeeEE! I am pleased. But the non-explanation on how she get pregnant and all is very confusing which makes me yearn for the book to come out faster. However the book and the column , not to mention film are very very different. The column, beforehand does have Mark asking Bridget to marry him and then chucking her. The film just ended up on the note of Bridget getting asked, but I couldn't for the life of me remembered the ending. The book, The Edge of Reason just ended wit...

I felt like crying hysterically today. But still I wish to blog today on Project Happy Malaysia since I do think its a great idea. But was thinking.. what kinda stories I can contribute, with my obviously crappy mood today.. What kinda stories I could write with my increasingly cynical outlook on life... on how great Malaysia or Malaysians are. Trying to figure out this piece of puzzle are not helping when you had just got out from a rainstorm; walking and clutching a tiny umbrella, mind you and the piece of arse standing in front of me, refuse to yield his position of a path not drowned by puddles of water. Him a man. Me a girl. So of course, I have to give this piece of arse way, and step into the puddle so he could walk and not dirty his shiny black shoes. I cursed you , man. May some kind of dirt or bird shit are stuck at his shoes and burnt a hole right into his stocking. Right. I got that out of my chest. Now. What ? Project Happy Malaysia. Oh God. I felt like bawling out now. *...

I remembered when I was living in Australia. Sometimes us family love to poke our head in , rummaging through the goodies of the flea market. From that day, til today..went I went to a flea market or car boot or bazaar whatever you may call it. I always look for second hand books stall. Okay, I think I left the point I'm gonna say here. During one of the trip to the flea market in Canberra, my father bought me an almost set of books. Game book as what I call it. I couldn't for the life of me, put my hand on what it is called. The book titled something like "Plane Crash", "Lost in whateverplaceitis". What different about these books from others are that... I can choose whatever ending I want! Its kinda like you are the character, and you get to make that choice. One of the example is kinda like.. You are lost and your car broke down. Ahead you see a big mansion and you knock to use the phone. Then someone open the door. Inside, you were offered a hot drink......

Few days back, I walked around KLCC in search for... well nothing. Just a good bargain thingies I guess. It is always very boring to scrounge for bargain in the 70% and 50% pile. Only once in a while you find a gem. That is a rare moment. Usually, those pile are hideous which I will never wore even if they gave it for free. I went into Esprit, Isetan, MNG (which have no more sale), FCUK, British India... boring, boring, boring. Either the hideous pile, or no offer. Well, I also out of things to buy. Got few clothes still have not worn yet in my closet. Shoes? I always prefer my ratty sandals anyway. OOoOohh.. and the new shoe I bought in Berjaya Times Square needs to taken to a cobbler. Why they always make girls sandal so slippery? They think we like to skate ourselves through the floor ar? I was beside myself. I meant I am at a shopping mall. I must, must buy something. So I went to Kinokuniya. Nothing there too but I always prefer to buy secondhand book , being such a cheapskate. In...

You snooze, you lose . Well I have snost and lost. I'm pushing through. I'll disregard the cost. I hear the bells. So fascinating and I'll slug it out. I'm sick of waiting. .... Excerpt from the song ( I Hear the Bells - Mike Doughty) Arrghh. Kemalasan melanda. Don't you ever felt ever so incredibly lazy a day before your exam, your great deadline, your project presentation? Well that's what I am feeling now. Not helping that I am feeling restless. Haih. Sit still. Eyes shadowed. Fingers twitched. Strands of hair tucked neatly behind one ear. Deep breath. Concentrate.

Yawn. Its Manic Monday. I always , always complaint when its Monday. Couldn't be help. We still have to go through Monday. Got to see PGL last weekend at Istana Budaya. We got good seat (It should be. I'm bankrupt already) so it was really nice. And it was spectacular. The sets and lighting is very very very nice. I love it. Hang Tuah is not as handsome as what most girls fawned about, but what he lacked in look, he makes it up with his singing chops. PGL the movie was bland at times, however this musical certainly lively and beautiful. But I must and must complaint. The music. This is a musical. I expect a majestic sweeping haunting lovely music to show its grand sad love story. All I get is a song somewhat like a pop song. The songs was disappointing. I didn't meant all the music. The majestic lively music where they dance about Majapahit and Melaka is a joy to hear and see. But its love song. I felt like ... blahh. I always wonder why our film don't have great music ...

Don't you ever have so many interesting things you want to blog about when you were up and about gadding around town. Then you are perched on top of your chair in front of the computer and open up blogger. All your seemingly wonderful inspiration seems to always dissapear. My muse had forsaken me. Why? Tell me why? Okay. No. I got no new things I bought that I must show off. Actually I am always buying thing, just the usual commonplace clothes that is no need to brag about. No place to go or planning to go. No new movies seen. Same old same old. Currently feeling horrible because of the meds I am on now. Horrible. Baaahhh. Hate meds. Meds are suppose to make you better. Not make you felt like you must throw up or crawl under the earth and lie there. Its either this or the horrible itch. Somehow when you are suffering under one kind of pain, you felt that is the worst. Then 2 of my corporate personas are on leave and MC today. One of them have a lower priority. So I have to take all...

Hi, my name is Dila. I am frivolous. It is to be applaud that I did not buy much during the recent sale. I bought one lousy shoe. Its even not that expensive. But I did splurged needlessly in one jewellery? Antique? item. I got carried away and splurged on a piece of broken crockery. You know the bowl and plate kinda one. Except this is in pieces. Well, but it is not exactly just any piece of crockery. Who can brag that they use to have a piece of something from a sunken ship! I can! Am I mad? Well a tad bit. Someone ask me , isn't it a bit expensive for a piece of crockery. I know! But I don't mind. Really. Initially, I want to buy a pendant. But since wearing tudung and the pendant is really big, and I don't really hanker going after the big-necklace-wore -out of tudung-Datin-look, I took a look at the bracelet. And wallaa. Mine look somewhat like this. What? SO puny one? Of course la. You think I am so rich ar to get something like the picture below? Actually have to sa...

I just got back from watching Wangi Jadi Saksi from Dewan Bahasa dan Pustaka. Being naturally lazy, and I don't think so I am adept in writing synopsis regarding theatre, this is the excerpt from Axcess website, " ...is the story of Hang Jebat's betrayal and murder, as told through the eyes of his young widow Dang Wangi, as she confronts those accountable for her husband's death. Using flashbacks and flash-forwards, Jebat's confrontations with his comrades and nemesis are revealed through a provocative new interpretation of this historical and legendary event ." Got all excited to watch this since I would love to see Vanida Imran up close (even though in a theatre and hundreds metres away) and I love the story of Jebat and Tuah. There is this one painting I always remembered, of Tuah and Jebat fighting and tombak and lembing are sticking out from the floor. So, my interest was piqued, thus I bought the tickets. Manage to get to Dewan Bahasa dan Pustaka in the...

I am feeling.. dumb today. I can almost feel my brain liquidifying and turning to mash? mesh? mush? What is the correct word? See see.. I told you I am feeling dumb today. I felt used, tired and oh so jaded with people today. But not that dark yet. Just a wee bit step away to completely hating mankind, so I transfered my affection to a non-entity. Which is none. Now. I don't make any sense. Okay. Explaining mode on. Kinda like, Davy Jones-wise, I am putting my tiny beating heart into a chest and kept the key. Well, except I don't tore my heart away, since it can be a bore to track those who will steal my heart for an organ donor. More like freezing it so that it can non feeling but just let it live enough so I won't be completely dead. Herm, probably that is why a chest is called a chest. Because we stored something inside of chest. Thus our chest stored our heart too. Man. I am weird today. Before I am spouting more nonsensical stuff, let's look at the state of the wor...

I got too much time on my hand. Nah. I am just bored and discontented. Anyway... being necessarily bored and fabulously nonchalant about it. (Just felt like throwing big words around even though it might be wrong) , I typed this and wallaa. All 10 signs pointing you are dating/seeing/marrying a sugar daddy-0. This is in no way related to any particular person *snickers* 1. Minus the 1 million in his bank account, you wouldn't touch him with a 10 foot pole. 2. Rummaging through your father closet for his digital camera, you found yourself staring at the same kemeja batik color and design your date wore to a formal dinner you both attend. 3. When both of you accidentally met his long lost friend, his friend remarked how fast and beautiful you had grown. 4. He have a bigger space in the bathroom shelves for his medication pills. 5. He knows more about anti aging cream than you do. 6. He woos you the old fashion way. Flowers. Jewellery. Fancy restaurant which other Datins don't fre...