Wednesday, March 24, 2010

My new favorite site

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I would think if you are typing while masturbating, it would be a masturbate fail. But then I had never participate in a sex chat.

Did I ever tell you how I try to participate in a sex chat, but failed because I was laughing so hard while shuddering? I don't know, if I ever did, but let me rehash the story. (I think I must have told to some of my friends)

I got into the internet back in 1998. It was fairly new at the time, and the thought that I can communicate with people from all around the world thrills me. Yes. I am not a boy, so I never care much about porn. But getting into the scary world of the WWW, you will be exposed to it anyway. Especially if you are new and a teenager.

Digressing. Like I said I like to chat. While everyone else was getting fired up on MiRC, at the time I got into Yahoo Chat and chatted with many, many people around the world. And I assure you, not only the Malaysian men/boys kept on asking for sex chat. Of course the phrase used then is cybersex. Is it still used now? I am no longer hip and cool. There was one time; an American, I think used the term " Do you want to Yahoo?" . Which meant cybersex. And I declined like all the other requests before me.

One bored day I got a little curious. I was wondering, how one actually 'do' a cybersex? I just want to see how it goes. So it goes something like

Boy in some part of the world: Hey you wanna cyber?

Me: Sure!

Boy: Great!

Me: Hmmm. This is my first time, so you need to teach me.
(Hmmm...I wonder if that got him fired up )

Boy: No worries. I will tell you what to do. First, go to your refrigerator and take a zucchini or a carrot.

Me: Why?

Boy: So you can slide it into your p****y ( There are some word that I just refused to type).

DilsUsernameAtTheTime had now logged out. 

I was aghast. I remembered thinking "Do people actually do that?" "Gah, gah, gah, gah, gah, gah!" while laughing hysterically. It just seems painful to me. And a gross misconduct and abuse to a vegetable. While it was tempting to let him go on and on but even now being 27 and married, I don't really want to know what people would suggest another person do to a zucchini.

But hey, I kinda missed chatting with random people around the world. But from what I know with webcams and everything, the chat world had gotten a whole lot more scarier. Its not all bad then. I used to get a Christmas card from some random dude I used to chat regularly with living in London. He is either a gym instructor or a gym enthusiast because he kept on mentioning doing weights. He got the most abysmal handwriting I had ever seen but still it was nice of him.




7 comments:

iceroll said...

hahahahaha. this is really one hillarious stuff. I really LOL. hahaha. And yeahh. Such an abuse to the vegetables too. How mean! (Yeah right). haha

Anasfadilah said...

oleh kerana sex store kene raid,rasa lebih ramai akan salah guna sayur..

makanan tu,yuck! put la something else..fikir la kan apa patut..hahah

suka baca oatmeal gak,gelak sorang-sorang selalu :)

FrH said...

hahaha so hillarious!!

i guess this would happen to only school teenagers .. sejak masuk u dah xde dgr dah psl ni .. bongok btol!!

Dils said...

Iceroll:
It just seems painful lor. Yeuch, yeuch. And carrot lagi horror ok. Bukan kasar ke tu. Euwwww.


Dila:
Oatmeal?

Kalo order online sex toys ni agak2 lepas ke? Hahaha..



Frh:
Mungkin sebab kalo dah uni tarak kejahatan sudah meningkat kut.

[re-arrange] said...

theoatmeal.com is a comic strip page dils. quite fun too. heheh.

now with webcam and stuff, cybersex getting much demanding. takde webcam tamau cybersex tu!

and pity me; my laptop doesn't hv one. sobsob.

LOL.

P/s: no, i dont need a carrot. HA HA HA.

Dils said...

Nanti aku usha, cam menarik.

Ah, so the uglies will also be denied the pleasure and anonymity of cybersex begituh.

Anasfadilah said...

dils::lepas. pasal ada malaysian yg buka kedai sex online.

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