Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Internet is Down

Here I am. The Internet connection at my company are acting up. Yesterday, we were left desolate , cut off from the cyber world. Well except the 4 of us who have the Corporate machine.

Today things improved. But my application is acting up, it kept on disconnecting. So I am having problems doing my work. I turn to blog. That means I am bored.

I got another job,in a server based company. However they wanted me to start immediately which is impossible. Haih. Read la. I say 1 month notice clearly in my resume. Sigh. Therefore I have to miss out on this opportunity. I could not leave my company in 24 hour notice and paid them RM2k. Simply said, it do not tempt me to leave my company in such fashion.

In making this decision, I turn to perform Solat Istikharah to ask God in providing some guidance. Hoping to get some kinda dream about jobs related stuff, I ended up waking up with an image of *ehem* *ehem* him in my mind. Felt disgusted with subconcious self that could not even detach in making life altering decision.

However the next day, I am fairly sure this should be my decision; that I could not simply just quit and go, so I took that as a sign and don't let doubt seeped into my mind again. Well at least mind numbing doubts with thousand of question marks flitting through mind.

Remembered my post of bleak hopeless future. Ahh.. I forgot to put the upside of it. Hahaha. I guess, I got carried away. Anyway, I will try to make some changes in my life.

Life on a job will drain your life away. I remembered my trainer Yunki asked me what I blogged about. I just shrugged and said stuff and all. He said it is good that I got things outside of work for my interest. It kept yourself grounded as a person and you wouldn't be stress or go mad from the hectic and pressure of work.

So, right. Why do you think I watch Grey's Anatomy so much? To see other people suffer in their own work!

But little changes can be made here and there. So big dreams are to be sighed about and think moonily of once in a while. Some people are just lucky to enjoy what they are paid to do everyday. While some, like others, just drudge on hoping for the best. However you can still make your little dreams happen. The thing you always wanted to do, the place you always wanted to see, the peoples you always wanted to visit.

6 comments:

obefiend said...

hang in there dils.. something will eventually come out. im preparing myself to enter the market. i have been scouting some studios for work and even enquiring about the work condition.

i guess im lucky in way. im 27 and still a student. but with friends who works i have insights on what to look for in a company. many of my friends are disillusioned with their career. which is sad. i mena these people gradated from Oxford, cambridge, imperial and also LSE. and they still have no job satisfaction!! i wonder why?

job drains you. that is a fact. i hope that wont happen to me. i get bored easily. probably become a job hopper next year!

Some said...

keje2

Uh-Non said...

Hey dils..Greys anatomy is where typical surgeon residents make USD200,000 a year and where doc sheperd's hands are insured for a cool USD2 mill , so I guess suffering to an extent in that line of work does make a lil' sense and well justified heh ?

On the bright side - don't worry, like effi says..most other 'old' (warga-emas) people arent doing much wif their life even now just yet, and people who are there where they want to arent really that happy..so stay chirpy kay dils ? just another phase goin on here...

PS: /me back from a month long hiatus

Dila said...

effi:
Yeah, i guess many are disillusioned in term of job satisfaction. I think probably they expected more , and got this job that you felt.. 'what a waste of 4 years I am studying..'

But, someone says that its normal for fresh graduate to job hop for a while. You need to find just the right job I guess, or at the end you think sod it. This is OK enough.

some:
same goes for you

Anon:
Haha, not necessarily. Malaysian doctors are known to have poor salary and the Malaysian govt wooing the overseas doctor to come back with salary 2 times over that an experienced doctor of 5 years got is rather galling to our doctor.

Its all about the passion I guess.
Being as chirpiest chirp chirp as possibly. *Chirp* *hiccups*

obefiend said...

PASSION

who are we kidding. i have yet to find a person who is passionate about their job. mostly disillusioned.

how to spot a passionate doctor

he works for Medicine San Frontiere.. now that is passionate. doktor yang nak duit bukan passionate. he is just taking care of his wellbeing and family. dont blame them. sendiri mau hidup also

i know im passionate about my work now. but i dman sure know i wont be when i work. like for example. sekarang pun disillusioned. my best work pun depa kata ada flaw. ok i get it i am not a pro. but when they start yapping nonsense about what they dont like about it. i get dissillusioned. even my lecturer had to correct the other lecturer's comment. he was just thinking at a tangent to what i am trying to convey

i am sure u met someone like this

lain kita cakap lain dia nak paham! SIGH

Dila said...

dils:

You are right. Most are disillusioned. However many engineers (you know the so called engineers from our own UTP) is very very satisfied with their placement in the world. Or probably they are just content to work in Petronas and received ridiculous bonuses. LOL.

You are taking arts courses now right? Huhu. I think those are easily more disillusioned too, since it might frustrates them that some just don't get it.

Needed to find a balance I guess. Passion in work? Haih..

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