Imagine walking along a dark alley, trying hard to not stare at anyone eyes. Blending with the environment, being invisible, so you will not be stalked, do not render attention from anyone. You see a suspicious looking guy watching you up as contemplating being a potential victim. . Heart stop. Walk faster. Damn! Heels caught in a drain. Yank! Yank! Stupid 2 1/2 inch heel as per company regulation.
This is what we have to go through everyday. Sometimes when we least expected it, they sprang at us after laying their trap, calculating our movements. Sly, oh yes they are. They are after all the menace of our free fun loving days. Yes.. they are the... come right at your face salesman.
Oh, I don't really despise them. Only... its kinda hard to be wary all the time when you want to shop and dream and chatters away. I meant... some people have to make a living right? So I would not actually condemn them , kut. But.. really lah.. sometimes I wish they would just bugger off. Sometimes after work, I went to KLCC. During my walk there, thanks to the shit droppings near Avenue K, I am fully alert enough to contemplate a strategy to be repellant to salesman. It had become thus that teruk(bad). The salesmans are littered from the middle eskalator from Avenue K until you are safe to step onto the eskalator going into KLCC. And these salesmans have these tactics. Yes, they pretend to be that friend who you think you might had shared a meal/dormitory/textbook with. Woe be fell at me, since I am generally naive and forgetful. Ahh.. they are not that wilful. Only out of nowhere while you are contemplating to either buy that strappy sandals or that buckled high heels, suddenly a face came LOOMING up at you. Grinning. Like a damn cheshire cat. They have this big grin you know. First thing came to my mind
1. Do I know him? ...................... Then...
2. My school/UTP fren kah?
3. Some obscure 3 or 4 remove cousin remove?
4. Pervert.. arrrrr .
Run Run Run. Being blocked. And then.. "Kakak/Adik... kami ade promosi bla bla bla bla"
5. Damn.. salesman.
Tooo late. Fine. Walk at the opposite direction. Was pursued. Replied
" Not interested" mumbled repeatedly while distractedly looking or waiting for some interruption/mobile phone to ring/someone yelling out "hey dils!!"/earthquake to happen/salesman being swallowed by alien with tripod.
None. Nothing. Null. Nil. All of these things could had happen ANYTIME but no.. the circumstances chose to desert me. So.. I have to chose to be rude and detached since I am unwilling to detach myself from my money on buying things I don't need (e.g. pen attached together with some kind of digital clock) and buy things I do need (e.g. blouse, shoes, glorious food).
I was also sometimes am a tiny bit curious to see what they are promoting. One time.. these guy la.. stop me. Offering me something. Not particularly being late at anything. I chose to stop. I am curious pon. What could he possibly say.. to tempt me. He was making unnecessary chat. I stop him.
" Get to the point"
I was in no hurry, yes, but I do have something more fun to do. He was a bit taken aback. Don't expect that from a little demure(?) looking short speky girl huh? He got to the point. Ah.. he was asking for a contribution for the WWF (not to be confused with big testosterone filled with steroid looking fella humping another big testosterone filled with steroid looking fella). WWF....yes I think I somewhat support that. I don't litter. Wait.. wrong organization. Anyhow.. it was asking for your bank account number or your credit card number.. WTH!!! I leave him after hearing that.
So now.. I am older and wiser. Say. A salesman comes up to you..discreetly..wearing that I-am-next-close-to-your-best-friend-grin. He is just starting to open his mouth.... What would you say/do?
- "Been there, done that."
- (Talk to the hand....literally)
- Take out your handphone.... Chatter away like there's no tomorrow. If there's a call or sms that I am suppose to make on that day... I would always conveniently choose that time.
- Look at him sulkily from the corner of your eye... and ignore him like our national soccer team might ignore the tiang gol.
- Run.. and scream, damn it. As if a bloody axe murderer might chase you with his swinging axe dripping with blood and maniacal cackling laugh.
Comments
you could always say something like,
salesman:err..adik, boleh luangkan masa sikit tak
you:sorry..nak cepat(sambil angkat tangan)
salesman:eh cepatnya..dengar dulu
you:sorry..nak balik ofis..lambat dah ni(sambil tunjuk jam and not missing a stride)
works everytime, at the avenue K escalators at least. :)
but my usual strategy would be the 'talk to the hand'. it never fails..
takmo kawan lah
talk to the hand and finger dude!
ahh.. no wonder..
but..if we are in a considerably bad mood... the salesman wont come eh..
just put in your worst face like someone had just killed your fav goldfish.. they will surprisingly distanced urself from you
anyway, 'buat muka' is the best and pretend not to hear anything. or just angkat tangan and say, it's ok..not interested. then teruskan berjalan.
anyway, how to talk to your hand arr?? you mean using HP ke? still cannot get the idea.
anyway, i hate KLCC for that salesperson or what so ever ppl call them. also hate salerperson at supermarket, always chasing after our butt like we're gonna steel something. hey, there's camera there to monitor me and if i need your help, i will call you. hate them, hate them!!
and you are right, hate those icky salesperson that walk almost right at our back..
It just spoilt the mood to browse and see..
especially if it's a small shop.. i feel as though i'm intruding.
Bad marketing strategy there